Disclaimer: I am not a professional! If you want to find a professional sex educator please look at http://fuckyeahsexeducation.tumblr.com/Resources. If you have any questions, feel free to ask on my ask site: http://fyseq.tumblr.com/ask, though check out http://fuckyeahsexeducation.tumblr.com/FAQ!
I make various buttons for gender, sexuality, kink and romantic pride. I also make buttons featuring male, female, intersex and transgender genitalia, including those with piercings. Check it out at https://www.etsy.com/shop/RFPCreations And check out my Tumblr at http://ftm-transscribed.tumblr.com/
What are some myths you think need to be busted about sexual orientation for teens?
What should teens know about sexual orientation?
What is your definition of “sexuality?” What parts of yourself are included in your sexuality?
Some answers we’ve gotten: your sexual and romantic orientation, and what you like sexually, like your kinks and desires.
What are some other things that can be included in your sexuality?
I can think of the way you feel about your body, your sexual arousal, sexual insecurities, and your libido or sex drive. Do you think gender can be a part of your sexuality? I know it’s definitely a part of mine.
What are other aspects that you think are part of your sexuality?
Submission: Bi/pan kerfluffle
I think a lot of the wrestling over definitions misses a major point behind the labels. Bi has a definition, pan has a definition, and within those there are nuances in how an individual personally applies it. It’s the personal nuance inside the general definition that seems to be what everyone is missing—it’s the link between “no there’s a definition for X, you can’t say it’s the same as Y, that’s ignorant and erasive” and "call yourself what you like, however you want to define it".
Nuance within a definition allows for personal detail without running over anyone else. It’s like the biological classification system: you have the big category called “bird”, and within that there’s the budgy, the hawk, and the pengiun. They’re all the same type, but have different details. Same for orientation: different details under the larger category. Bi is *generally* more than one but not all, and within that umbrella people have different details. Pan is *generally* all people/genders, and within that umbrella people focus on different details.
I’ve not run into this type of fight over gender categories. People know this is obvious with gender, that you have the larger categories with defining detail under it. The fight there is more “where is the line”, which really, isn’t so much a valid question as it is a human obsession with a need to have definite categories. Same for orientation, too—there isn’t a big fat line delineating these things. There’s wobbly areas between them when you get down to the line; but again, that doesn’t mean delineation isn’t possible, as above.
FYSE note: just one little correction.Bi is generally same gender and different genders, not more than one but not all. Many bisexuals are attracted to all genders. But you are right, it’s not about identifying others, everyone can identify themselves, but it’s important not to make preconceived notions about groups based on what you think the definition of their orientation is.
I feel like I need to post this after some of the comments I’ve seen after yesterday’s post on Asexuality.
Sexual attraction does not equal sexual arousal or sex drive.
Straight people can have sex with the same gender and like gay porn.
Gay people can have sex with another gender and like straight porn.
Multisexual people can have sex with a gender they aren’t normally attracted to and like porn including that gender.
Asexual people can have sex and like porn.
Your sexual orientation is based on sexual attraction; what genders you feel the draw of attraction to based on wanting to be sexual with them. You can have the drive to have sex with someone you aren’t sexually attracted to. Asexuality is just the lack of sexual attraction, they can still have sex drives and enjoy sex.
And you know what? The only one who can define their sexual orientation is the individual. You can’t define someone else’s sexuality and the whole “pretending to be a certain sexual orientation for attention” is a myth. Stop perpetuating it.
Submission: Safer Sex and Young FAAB Dykes/Queers
Can lesbians really contract STIs? Do trans guys who only have sex with cis women really have to use barriers? Does anyone actually use dental dams? Do they work?
To be clear: this confusion about how and why to have safer sex is not because of those sexist tropes that “lesbian sex” or vulvas and vaginas are so goddamn confusing. It’s because safer sex between two people with vulvas is so rarely discussed. […]
When I first learned about safer lesbian sex as a teenager, it seemed like this highly esoteric practice. None of my early lovers knew about it and I couldn’t imagine how to bring it up. When I read about women using gloves and dams, they were always a lot older and more sexually experienced than me. Gloves and dental dams felt more like props for sexual roleplay than actual safety devices.
-Laurel Isaac, "Figuring Out How to be a Lesbian Safer Sexpert"
[An exploration of the challenges queer FAAB-people encounter to practicing safer sex, and a run down of the real risks. Read more on Scarleteen.]
Hi there, I’m Charlie Hale. I’m a fairly new blogger on the topic of Feminism, LGBT, Polyamory and Kink (Blog, Tumblr, Twitter). This is a piece on labels for non-monosexuals (bisexual? pansexual? sexual?) that I thought may be appropriate for FYSE.
Some use “bisexual”, some use “pansexual”, others just “sexual” and my personal favourite is “not fussy.” I personally use pansexual in the company of people who are likely to know what that is, and bisexual for those who won’t – but there are almost as many opinions in the topic as there are people.I didn’t always identify as pansexual, though – I originally thought I was straight (also, a man, but that’s a point for another day), followed by bisexual with a leaning towards women… and as I slowly learned that feelings for men weren’t wrong and allowed myself to explore my feelings more, I very much found that I had no real gender preference and eventually came to pansexual.The most important thing to say is that none of those labels arewrong.They have similar meanings, but can have different implications to different people. I use pansexual because it clicks with me – I find that I am attracted to people without concern to their gender (see also “not fussy”) and to me, pansexual works. That’s all that really matters.