fuck yeah sex education




Sex Positive and Body Positive educational place. Includes information about different relationships, genders, sexuality, sexual preferences, safety precautions and everything else that could pertain in the education of sex. Accepting of all walks of life.
If you have any questions, feel free to ask on my ask site: http://fyseq.tumblr.com/ask, though check out http://fuckyeahsexeducation.tumblr.com/FAQ!


Children’s books on Child Sexual Abuse

There are a lot of children’s books on child sexual abuse that can be found in bookstores, online, and in libraries and are used by parents, teachers, and therapists. It can be difficult to tell where to start. Unfortunately there is no cut and dry answer. Every child is different and every adult is different. What may work well for one person may not work well for another. Here are some tips:

Find something recommended for the child’s age group. A lot of books will include somewhere (either in the book or online information) what age group it is recommended to read it. For example, “Some Parts are Not for Sharing” by Julie Federico is good for as young as 6 months while I Can Play it Safe by Allison Feigh is recommended for ages 4-8. Also keep in mind that you know your child best. Your child may only have an attention span for short books, or your child may get really board with shorter and more simple books. A lot of older books like “My Body is Private” by Linda Girard aren’t very colorful which can be a turn off for a lot of young children. Vibrant and fun illustrations are a must for many children.

Which leads me to my second point, never read a book to a child before reading it yourself. I learned this the hard way by reading a horrible book on potty training to my little brother that talked about a potty fairy who gives treats to children who stay in bed all night. Needless to say, my little brother was expecting a treat in the morning. What this also helps you do is to tailor the reading experience to your child. Book too long and detailed to read in one go, like “I Said No” by Kimberly and Zach King, divide it up into different lessons for the child. Do you see something that will need more explanation to your child? Plan to talk to your child about it beforehand. Many books have a parent’s guide or Teaching Moments like “U Touch I Tell” by Chi Hasseinion. Go through them for more resources and information that can be helpful. Just do more research, as some information can be outdated or inaccurate. 

Finding a book to read is just one step. You can’t just read one book (or even several books) one time to your child or hand it to them and let them read it and expect them to be prepared. You need to talk about this subject many times both in the context of books and outside of the context of books. Talk more deeply about the parts of the book you resonate with most, talk about things left out of the books you read, ask your child if they have any questions. Always connect with the child after reading them a new book to see how they’re feeling or what they’re thinking. Basically, let this book be a way to start a conversation, not be the only conversation you have with your child about abuse.

Diversity is super important with children’s books in general, and books on this subject are no exception. Many books these days do pretty well on racial diversity, but other types of diversity are difficult to find. Many books on this subject, like “Amazing You” by Gail Saltz include gendering language and aren’t transgender friendly. I’ve yet to find good books on Child Sexual Abuse that aren’t gendering, except “Some Parts Are Not For Sharing” by Julie Federico which have fish for main characters. Family Diversity is another important thing. If a book tells you to “go tell your mom or dad” and they’re not raised by a mom or dad, what should they do? “I Can Play it Safe” by Allison Feigh uses the phrase “Adult that takes care of you” instead of parents. For books that don’t have enough language diversity, you can use your own words, just let your child know you’re replacing words when they’re learning to read as that can confuse them.

You may not know what content to look for in a book. Like I said before, doing research can help with that. Here’s my opinion on things that should be addressed. The first is that any place on the body can be a place that abusers touch. Many books, like “I Said No” emphasize that the bathing suit area or underwear area are your private parts, while others like “Your Body Belongs to You” by Cornelia Spelman emphasize that any part of your body may be touched in a way that is abusive. If the book you choose leaves this out, talk to your children about it. Also, many books like “Good Touch/ Bad Touch” by Robert Kahn say that bad touches feel bad, while that’s not always true. Some abusive touches don’t feel bad, and may even feel good, especially if a lot of grooming or manipulation are used. On a similar note, not all touches that a child doesn’t like may be abusive. In “My Body is Private” it is emphasized that it’s okay to say no at any touch, even harmless touches. Another important fact is that anyone can be an abuser, and a lot of the time it is someone you know or like. “I Said No” is a real situation that happened to a child by one of his best friends. I would go even further honestly, because it talks about Doctors giving exams, the emphasize that doctors can be abusers too. It’s important that the book talk about different kinds of touch and different kinds of instances where one can be abused. Another great point is to emphasize that secrets aren’t really good, and that there’s a difference between secrets and surprises. Many books address this, including “Do You Have a Secret” by Jennifer Moore. It’s also important, especially if you’re a teacher and don’t know the family situation, to emphasize that you keep telling people if you’re being abused until you find one that listens to you. Unfortunately not all people are going to believe a child. “I Said No” addresses this.

Another important thing to think about is price of the books. You can find many of these books in libraries, usually in parenting sections. Even if your library doesn’t have it it may be able to order it for you. Ask a librarian for help. If you want to own the book buy used either at a book store or on Amazon. Amazon has some great deals, especially for older books. You may also be able to use therapists or school libraries as a resource. Some readings and copies of the books can be found on youtube. 

Am I Overexercising?

recoveryisbeautiful:

The Obligatory Exercise Questionnaire

(1) Never
(2) Sometimes
(3) Usually
(4) Always

To Score:

Reverse the scores for #8 and #10.
                                  (Ex: 1=4, 2=3)
Count up your total. 

  1. I engage in exercise on a regular basis.
  2. I engage in one/more of the following forms of exercise: walking, jogging/running, or weight lifting.
  3. I exercise more than 3 days per week.
  4. When I don’t exercise I feel guilty.
  5. I sometimes feel like I don’t want to exercise, but I go ahead and push myself anyway.
  6. My best friend likes to exercise.
  7. When I miss an exercise session, I feel concerned about my body possibly getting out of shape.
  8. If I have planned to exercise at a particular time and something unexpected comes up (like an old friend coming to visit or some work that needs immediate attention) I will usually skip my exercise for that day.
  9. If I miss a planned workout, I attempt to make up for it the next day.
  10. I may miss a day of exercise for no good reason.
  11. Sometimes, I feel a need to exercise twice in one day, even though I may feel a little tired.
  12. If I feel I have overeaten, I will try to make up for it by increasing the amount I exercise.
  13. When I miss a scheduled workout session I may feel tense, irritable, or depressed.
  14. Sometimes, I find that my mind wanders to thoughts about exercising.
  15. I have had daydreams about exercising.
  16. I keep a record of my exercise performance, such as how long I work out or or how far/fast I run.
  17. I have experienced a feeling of euphoria or a “high” during or after an exercise session.
  18. I frequently “push myself to the limits”.
  19. I have exercised when advised against such activity (by a doctor, friend, ect.).
  20. I will engage in other forms of exercise if I am unable to engage in my usual form of exercise.

Scores:

30 or less, your exercise is probably not obligatory (note: this does NOT mean you don’t still have some form of exercise addiction or abuse).
30-40, there is reason for mild concern.
40-50, may suggest you have moderate problems with obligatory exercise.
Above 50, you should consider finding ways to moderate your exercise.

(Source: The Exercise Balance)

(via recoveryisbeautiful)

Currently attending a Webinar on Review of Child Sexual Abuse Prevention Resources, will be posting once it’s over.

haveagaydayorg:

Being a trans girl is like…..being a tall girl, or a short girl, being a girl with freckles, or a girl with defined cheekbones.Every girl is born a little different, every girl is unique.  nothing about a girls body make her more or less of a girl.  And nothing a girl does makes her less or more of a girl.Being a transgender girl is just like being every other kind of girl - its an identity.  :) (nothing more, nothing less)  - by transgirlnextdoor
masakhane:

plannedparenthood:

Using two methods of birth control, like the pill+condoms, is the BEST protection from pregnancy AND STDs. Better to be double safe than double sorry!

Bre, Masakhane Program Development Intern

What’s your power team?

Sex and Tweens: Why You Need to Talk to Them NOW

healthysexandyou:

    image

Of course children talk about sex. Tweens talk about sex. Teenagers talk about sex. EVERYONE TALKS ABOUT SEX.

Exactly what – and who – is a tween? Tweens range in age from 10 to 12 years or 8 to 14 years, depending on whom you ask. The U.S. Census estimates that there are more than 20 million tweens in the country; just under half are girls, and they are the primary focus of this story. The nickname “tween” references a vaguely defined life stage (somewhere between childhood and adolescence) but it also delineates a dynamic marketing niche. At the same time, the word tween has become so common that it allows many adults to distance themselves from this radical transformation in the sexualization of young girls, as if it were just another life stage.

Why do we keep thinking this isn’t happening? Why do adults keep fooling themselves into believing that children don’t want to know about sex? Why do adults keep thinking that if children know about sex, they will have it immediately after talking about it?

How many times do we need to remind you that children talk about sex, with their friends, ALL THE TIME? This is where they’re getting their information from, and if you can remember, it wasn’t great info. In fact, it’s really bad information.

They live in a world, especially girls, where if they look older, they’re treated as though they were older. I remember looking 24 years old when I turned 14, and I can tell you right now, the world treated me as though I were 24. Thankfully, I fought to stay my age, but that isn’t always the case.

Tween girls are pseudo-mature. They have the lingo but they don’t have the life experience or the emotional maturity to really understand it and manage it. For some kids, that’s scary, though they probably wouldn’t admit it. For other kids, it’s provocative and titillating and something they can’t manage. Kids are being asked to respond to and exist in a world that is just too grown-up for them.”

Be in charge. Tell your children about sex, all of it, and tell them when and how they should wait, how they should say no AND how they should say yes. These conversations, I repeat, ARE ALREADY HAPPENING.

Don’t kid yourself, your child will one day have sex. Make sure it’s a healthy and happy experience when they do, because you taught them what a healthy and happy sexual experience should look like.

image

One of the reasons I think that the Our Whol Lives curriculum for 10-12 year olds needs to be expanded. This is such an important age for sex education.

Lessons Learned From Menstruation Pop Quizzes While Being Intersex

autostraddle:

Lessons Learned From Menstruation Pop Quizzes While Being Intersex

Hey, there, Autostraddlers. Looking at me now, what do you see?

image

Well, okay, don’t look at The Wild Thing.

I mean, if we were passing each other on the street and you saw me. How would you read me?

Before you could even think about it, your brain would probably stamp me: FEMALE. I can’t really blame your subconscious for doing so. Part of being a living thing is to recognize stuff, categorize things, figure out who ‘s who and what’s what and what the hell is going on out here. Our brains do this kind of stuff all the time, although we can train ourselves to critically examine those thoughts when they do.

View On WordPress

fyseq:

Hey, I got an asker whose sexual orientation is Fluid and is looking for resources on fluid sexuality and a support community talking about the issues that can come up with fluid sexuality. Any followers who would be willing to answer questions or who have any resources or communities this asker may be interested in?

I hear a lot of complaints about skin, and as someone with lots of cystic acne, stretchmarks, and scars, I understand that. Just know that no one’s skin is perfect and we all have our little skin quirks that in my opinion make the skin we live in that much more interesting.
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